Friday, May 20, 2011


Jason Giambi: nothing but "orange juice"... (heh, heh)
Jason Giambi isn't quite ready to ride down the Colorado River in a de-inflatable kayak.

The embattled King of the Instant Weight Room launched three jacks in Philadelphia last night, keeping the slick chicks waiting at river's edge and sending me a not-so-subtle (Giambi? Subtle?? Visualize a flying mallet...) message that he's not ready to relinquish the Rockies' pinch-hitting rocking chair to Matt Stairs.

Yes, it was Kyle Kendrick (he of the hot young wife, who probably has a better fastball than he does...) who served up two of Jason's bombs.

Many folk are discounting Jason's achievement as a result of facing "sub-standard" pitching--but, hey, Kyle didn't serve up the gophers to Carlos Gonzalez, or Troy Tulowitzki, two of Jason's teammates who aren't close to needing a rocking chair.

Jason will always be controversial, but we should celebrate even those folks with "the taint" because they will soon be extinct from the game and folks will lament having to think up new things to moralize about.

Trust me, they will pine for the days of easy scapegoats...

Traipsing through the statistical megaload that Forman et fils make available to us, I am struck by the notion that it might not have been the 'roids that brought Jason (and his In'n'Out fueled physique) to his peak. The chart seems to indicate that Jason's best years coincide with the years where he was able to excel against left-handed pitching.

I don't know about you, but I am not holding my breath for the medical study indicating that steroids create a marked success rate against pitchers of the opposite hand.

Jason probably has a year or two left before he needs to commandeer that kayak. What say that we enjoy him in all his tawdry glory until that time...

...and then Matt Stairs can take his place in the Rockies' rocking chair.